He lifts me up..

We all get hurt in life in our relationships and interactions with other people.

I have been hurt, and I did some stupid things because I thought I was okay, yet I was not. I have kissed different men of different ages in a very short space of time. I didn’t want to admit it, but now I do, because I am not so proud of myself. The experience has left me with a terrible feeling.

I cried, asking him to see what he had made of me. I no longer knew myself. I had been shattered right to the core. And now I sit down and ask God – where were you? Why didn’t you protect me from this? I feel vulnerable, I feel exposed and I feel as though I have not been able to handle anyone who has given me that much attention.

Void in my heart

I have a deep seated distress within me. I have no idea how it has come to be, but I think I feel betrayed, I feel neglected, I feel I am lonely and I have this deep hunger for God to speak to me.

It has been two if not more months before I could actually fast and pray. Though, as a leader I have been thrust on the altar to lead in prayer, or song or to preach and have stood there and asked God to give his children what he wanted them to get, I feel my spiritual life has been either stagnant or regressing.

It has become even more difficult to go through the bible, and recently I was telling myself that I needed to memorise scripture so that I do not necessarily need to carry my bible. And here I am stuck between wanting to memoraise and not reading the bible at all.

Can We Heal on Our Own?

When a relationship goes the wrong way, you experience some sort of wounding inside. It may be mild, moderate, or severe, but there is hurt. You may feel used, let down, controlled, or put down, depending on what has happened. But it is a thoroughly negative experience. 

In and of itself, the existence of the wound is not a bad thing. In fact, it is a sign that you are alive and that the person meant something to you. If the person you love most looked at you and said, "I don't want you anymore," and you thought, Oh well, that's a choice you have a right to make, with no emotional response, that is a problem. 

Help me Lord

I have been feeling tired lately. Pitching up at home very late, sitting in the office till late, and I have been asking myself what for?

God I need your help!!

I am tired of a broken down home. I have held on, and I am still believing in your saving power Lord, but honestly speaking I am tired.

I don't know how long I can hold on father, I am only believing in you to bring the family back again. I am so lost, and I feel helpless, but I am holding on to your cloak because I have the confidence that hope in you does not dissapoint.